Posts Tagged ‘dog’

Kindness

Thursday, July 24th, 2014

I had errands to do and I wanted to get them out of the way early because the weather is in the 90s and I like to be inside where there is ac. I headed home and as soon as I pulled up the driveway and parked a flood of sadness washed over me, making my way to the front door I did not want to open it due to the absence of my little friend who was always right there waiting for me. I missed seeing her little face staring out the window as I drove up and I didn’t want to feel the heavy weight of emptiness once I opened the door. I thought, “why can’t this just not be real”. Feeling all woe be gone and sorry for myself I opened the door and entered and saw a box of flowers. I thought, oh my gosh, who sent flowers,I opened the box and was so surprised to find they were from an online friend, Diane, better known as Enchy, short, for Enchylatta. I am so touched by this act of kindness, how could I possibly remain pouting after that, and every time I look at those gorgeous sun flowers I am going to snap myself back into that good place of acceptance, during this first most difficult week of loss.

sunflowers

The act of kindness made me think of this poem:
Kindness

Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things,
feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.

Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone
who journeyed through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.

Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.

Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day to mail letters and
purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
it is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you every where
like a shadow or a friend.

by Naomi Shihab Nye

kindness

RIP my spirited little puggie Sassafras

Thursday, July 24th, 2014

sassy

sassy

sassy 1

sass

sassy

RIP Princess Pugliese Sassafras Anders
my faithful little friend crossed over on Monday, its been a very difficult week. She was a joy and I know we gave her a good life.

About a Pug

Monday, July 30th, 2012

Before I met my husband I was working in the Bay area as an apartment complex manager. When tenants moved out I was required to inspect the apartment for damage and cleanness. One time, while I was inspecting an apartment the lady had a friend helping her with the last minute details and the friend had a friend with her. It was a baby pug. I could not believe my eyes, I had never seen a baby pug, they kind of look like aliens with their big heads and pop eyes!
balthazarbaby

I just about died from the cuteness and vowed that if I ever got out of my apartment living I would get a pug. Fast forward five years, I met my Jerry and we got married and got a house and within a month we had the pugster, my Balthazar. At that time my husband was working very long hours and often over seas and out of town and all I had was Balthazar so of course, I doted on him like a child. Dressing him up and taking him with me every where. After a few months we decided that he really needed a play mate since he had so much energy and that was when we decided to get Sassafras, long for Sassy since she was such a spirited little girl when we picked her up in the parking lot at the local Safeway. I literally squealed when I saw her she was soooo tiny sitting on the pavement in that parking lot that I almost didn’t see her at all! Oh she was such a cutie pie and we took her home to Balthazar and he cried he was so excited! he did not know what to make of her, she was so tiny next to him. What a fun moment that was. They have been together ever since.

Two of my fur children
I remember when he was a tiny pup I would carry him in a little purse like carrier with his head popped out at one end. I took him like this when we went to the SFMOMA, he was asleep and I guess they thought he was a stuffed animal because they let me through with him and I got up to the third level before one of the guards realized I had an animal with me. HA!balto

Shortly after acquiring him I quit the job I was working at as an after school program director because they would not let me bring him to work. I had been told prior that I would be able to have him so I was angry they reneged, and I am just not the type of dog owner who can leave a dog home by itself for 8 or 9 hours.

I use to call him “King Tut” because he had this big dog in a small body thing, he was quite the alpha male, so full of personality. When I would pick him and put him on my lap, he would promptly turn front sitting up on his hind legs like I was his person doing what I am suppose to be doing, holding and doting on him!

Of course he loved his walks and he loved his baths. Not so much the washing part but the drying part. he would roll around on the towels and stretch making the funniest I feel good noises and then in appreciation he would jump up at me with kisses, with his big oversized tongue that always hung outside his mouth cuz it didn’t fit!

He was a very emotional dog too, if he saw me crying or heard me yelling he would bark and cry out also. It was very touching.

He so adored getting in the pool and jacuzzi with us. If he were inside the house and he heard one of us in the pool swimming he would bark like crazy and stare out the window door pacing back and forth and he would not even be distracted by food or treats. If we were in the jacuzzi he would bark and cry till we took him in with us, and he would race across the thin ledge like a tight rope walker, we marveled at how fast he was and he did not fall down! When people were over they would get such a kick out of Balthazar jumping on my back for a piggy back ride in the shallow end of the pool, oh he was in heaven those days!
Swimmer pug

Every time he went out into the back yard he would stare at the pool. Even after he went blind. He would go right to the ledge and look down, he knew the water was there.

Balthazar

About five years ago he became diabetic and in less than a year he went blind. I will never forget the look on his face when I went to throw him a treat and he could not see it and I realized and he realized that he could not see it. I felt helpless and sick about it. But for about four years he could still see shadows and shapes and get around, he actually did quite well. But about 6 months ago the blindness increased severely and his world went completely dark. His demeanor and disposition changed dramatically. He became very insecure and wanted me around him constantly. If I left the house he would howl relentlessly, it was awful, and heart breaking. He would spend most of the day like a little bumper car, bumping into walls looking for me. It was stressful being needed so intensely and quite painful knowing that his quality of life had diminished even further. It has been a series of problems since as he continued to deteriorate and his liver became enlarged and he could not eat or hold down food or water. Today, we had to let him go, he was suffering and I really could not bear it. His last week at home was one of the worse weeks of my life. I had hoped for a miracle. But there was not a miracle in sight. You may think, he was just a dog, but I couldn’t have felt any worse were he a person. Love is love whether it be person or animal and I loved him so deeply and I miss him so much. It was such a relief to euthanize him because I know his body had turned on him completely. I was glad he would no longer have that ravaged little body and his beautiful spirit could be at blissful peace.

blindI am so grateful for the cherished memories, the 12 years of unconditional love and fun. What a blessing he was, making our every day so much richer and joyful.

balthazar
RIP my beloved Balthazar

There will be art!

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2012

There will be art. Soon. We are wrapping up the transition from one humble abode to another more humbler abode by the end of the month. Tenants will be in place and I will be free to pursue my painting and creating mania as per usual. Walks through the hood and photo documentation of life’s affirmations will continue as well.

For now, here is my dear Sassy, choosing garbage bag over carpet.

A Place to Bark

Monday, June 28th, 2010

My colleague and friend Renee has put together a book of art to help raise money for “A Place to Bark”, Bernie Berlin’s dog and cat rescue.

She says: “The auction is nearing it’s end. There’s less than 24 hours left and I’m hoping to get one last burst of promotion out there to raise the bid for Bernie and the animals.

Once again in case someone missed it…here’s the link for the slide show of the book
Renee Troy

And, here’s the link for the auction

Please pass it along to anyone who may be interested or will pass it along to someone else who will”.